Fear is a strange and curious companion that we all encounter most days, to greater or lesser degrees. Touted in various articles and ads as an achievable goal is a state of "fearlessness." A noble quest. Fear as something to be conquered. The slogan goes something like, "Once you have conquered fear, you will reach the highest heights, overcome all manner of phobias. Get the guy; get the … [Read more...]
Taking the panic out of pandemic
The word pandemic conjures up a host of overwhelming thoughts and feelings. The idea that a virus could be so enormous, so powerful, that it would pose a global threat is something only imagined in movies and sci-fi novels ... until now. While history shows us that numerous parts of the world previously suffered life-threatening and life-taking viruses, this is the first time in this … [Read more...]
How triggers from the past haunt the present
Back in the day there was a famous horse named Trigger. He was a 15-hand palomino rode by cowboy star Roy Rogers. Times have changed just a little! Today the word “trigger” has been repurposed and embraced by the therapeutic community. It has complex meanings and interpretations, but usually refers to reactions and feelings activated in the present but relating to the past. Triggers may … [Read more...]
What a person wants
In the middle of a heated exchange, words of exasperation directed at you come out something like, "Well, what do you want?!" These words can be stunning to hear, even disorienting. Feelings of anger and hurt surface. The concept of "what you want" feels foreign. But think about this for a moment. What you want does matter, and should be considered. What you want in life, in a relationship; … [Read more...]
The leading edge and the trailing edge
Here are some affirmations to manage the toxicity of shame. And steps toward effective communications in loving enduring relationships. 1. I remind myself I am a precious, lovable, loving human being. My worth is defined by my values and principles. This stands on a foundation of love, kindness, self-acceptance, tolerance and compassion. 2. I'm aware of a negative shaming voice within my … [Read more...]
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