Ever notice yourself complaining about your neighbor always talking on his cell phone so loudly ... or the person in the supermarket taking forever to pay at checkout ... or a senior driving so slowly on the freeway you figure she shouldn't be allowed to drive? What if you took a beat and observed yourself on any given day. Chances are your driving might well be under par sometimes, too. … [Read more...]
The language of labels: Return to sender
How many times have we said or heard comments such as: "How stupid she is" or "What a moron" or "You’re an idiot." Do you ever stop to think that might be verbal assault? Does it really feel good when you express yourself that way? It certainly doesn’t feel good to be on the receiving end of such verbal abuse. These forms of expression are in truth are cowardly and lazy. They're ways of … [Read more...]
Out of the past: road rage
Ever wondered why bad drivers get you so worked up? Ever consider that you're not really mad, but scared? Afraid that someone's careless driving could injure you, even take your life? We all go from zero to 100 in a split second when we feel our lives are endangered on the road. It's understandable that drivers react to this needless peril in a dramatic fashion -- but where does all that … [Read more...]
‘I can see how you would feel that way’
How often do we really listen to the ones we love? And when we do, why are we so ready to defend and justify our behaviors that our loved ones say are harmful? What if just for a moment, we take that essential beat and then turn to healing thoughts such as these: If this person didn't care about me he would not be hurt by me. I impact this person, therefore I must matter a lot to her. He … [Read more...]
The subtle art of manipulation
Manipulation gets a bad rap. It's not always a bad thing. Sometimes manipulation can change a situation that might be headed in a harmful direction into a healing one. For example, Sarah, a teenager, is getting ready to go on her first date. She comes down the stairs and asks her parents if she looks OK. She is nervous, unsure of her appearance and could easily collapse into shame. … [Read more...]
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