Healing Psych

Dr. Katrina Wood's psychotherapy blog

Absolutes: Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater

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How many times have your heard yourself in an argument use words like "always" and "never." Most likely you have many times hurled statements such as, "You always accuse me of this or that," or, "You never have a good word to say about me," or, "We will never get along?" Sound familiar? Ever notice how quickly things break down while trying to express yourself with these absolutes? In the … [Read more...]

A healthy child makes for a healthy adult

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For children to be mentally stable and to feel loved, they must be allowed to express their fears and pain of losses, as well as their hopes and longings. The parent or primary caregiver must listen to, bear the burden of and validate the child's thoughts and feelings with compassion, love, comfort and care. This is the cornerstone of creating a foundation of deep self worth and safety … [Read more...]

The language of labels: Return to sender

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How many times have we said or heard comments such as: "How stupid she is" or "What a moron" or "You’re an idiot." Do you ever stop to think that might be verbal assault? Does it really feel good when you express yourself that way? It certainly doesn’t feel good to be on the receiving end of such verbal abuse. These forms of expression are in truth are cowardly and lazy. They're ways of … [Read more...]

‘I can see how you would feel that way’

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How often do we really listen to the ones we love? And when we do, why are we so ready to defend and justify our behaviors that our loved ones say are harmful? What if just for a moment, we take that essential beat and then turn to healing thoughts such as these: If this person didn't care about me he would not be hurt by me. I impact this person, therefore I must matter a lot to her. He … [Read more...]

The subtle art of manipulation

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Manipulation gets a bad rap. It's not always a bad thing. Sometimes manipulation can change a situation that might be headed in a harmful direction into a healing one. For example, Sarah, a teenager, is getting ready to go on her first date. She comes down the stairs and asks her parents if she looks OK. She is nervous, unsure of her appearance and could easily collapse into shame. … [Read more...]