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Addictions everywhere — here’s help
Today, we know that there are many more addictions in our society than just the obvious ones such as alcoholism and illegal drug addiction.
For example, Internet pornography has become a fast-growing addiction for young men as well as adult men.
Prescription drug addiction is on the rise and is a fast-growing addiction today for women, even greater than alcohol.
Other addictions that continue to spread and often go unrecognized include gambling, work addiction and food addictions.
Codependency also counts as an addiction. That’s the enabling and dependency that comes from living life and deriving one’s worth from another person — rather than feeling self-worth within or loving one’s self for who one is.
All addictions are debilitating. Unless treated they progressively become worse as time goes on.
Here are some key questions to ask yourself if you suspect you may have an addiction:
- Is the quality of my life impaired by my addiction?
- Do I tell myself I have control over my habit — that I am not suffering from an addiction?
- Have I tried to quit my addiction and found that I am unable to do so?
- Does my need for my addiction take up most of my day and has it become more important than anything and anyone else?
- Are the relationships in my life suffering due to my addiction?
- Has a close relative or friend suggested I might have an addiction?
- Do I practice my addiction in secret?
- Do I suffer from feelings of low self-worth and depression that make me feel trapped?
- Do I tend to isolate myself from others and fail to acknowledge when I feel sad or lonely or scared?
- Am I afraid to ask for help?
- Do I see asking for help as a weakness?
It is scary and painful to admit you may have an addiction.
Admitting you need help is not only an important step, it is a courageous one and a great strength. Millions of Americans needlessly suffer in silence from all kinds of addictions.
If any of the items on the checklist applies to you, consider seeking help to restore your rightful quality of life.
We are all vulnerable human beings who have the right to rely on one another to help us through our pain and suffering.
Learn to live life fully, and have joy and love in your life.
Addiction resources
Here are some treatment options for those battling addictions:
The Meadows
Promises treatment center
Cri-Help
AIM House
… a good community forum:
SoberRecovery.com
… and a helpful book:
Facing Love Addiction
Grab some sunshine and share it
Each day make a decision to take a risk. No matter how small or large.
Make the decision to say or do something that makes you a better person.
Say good morning to the neighbor you have told yourself you can’t stand.
Take the old lady down the street a small bunch of flowers or leave them on her doorstep with a note that says: Hope this brightens your day!
Let the guy who cuts you off in traffic get away with it, without a honk from your horn.
Smile at the person in line at the bank who has nothing good to say about life. Let him know you hope his day goes better for him.
Play peek-a-boo with a baby in a stroller.
Smile even though you don’t feel like it. Go on, just crack a small smile … you just might find yourself breaking into laughter.
Tell yourself you have talents that even you don’t know about and that you will be open to discovering new things about yourself this very day.
Above all, remind yourself that you are a precious human being worthy of giving and receiving love.
Thank God, the Universe, the force and life before you eat a snack or meal.
Give thanks.
Practice gratitude — say please and thank you even when you don’t feel like it.
Ask for help and support.
Give help and support.
Sewing back on your personal Shadow
Ever notice yourself complaining about your neighbor always talking on their cell phone loudly … or the person in the supermarket taking forever to pay at the checkout … or a senior driving so slowly on the freeway you figure she shouldn’t be allowed to drive?
What if you took a beat and observed yourself on any given day.
Chances are your driving might well be under par sometimes, too. Remember the other day when that guy honked at you for weaving into his lane while you were daydreaming?
That was you.
Ever wonder why you’re so critical of your neighbor’s motorcycle that clutters up his driveway? And, oh yes, the way he gets decked out in all that tacky leather gear. Maybe you’ve always secretly wanted to take a ride on a Harley and prove you, too, were born to be wild.
What if he was the part of you that wanted more?
Ever wonder why you shamed the guy at work for having a hair transplant, when inside you know your own hair is thinning — and you just don’t have the courage to admit it and go for a consultation like your coworker did.
What if he was the part of you that wanted more?
What about the way you downplayed that beauty spa treatment your friend took? The one you say you don’t need? In fact, you have a fear of — and a secret longing for — getting naked along with your friend and everyone else, and immersing yourself in those warm and healing waters.
What if she was the part of you that wanted more?
Before you jump to judgment, take that essential pause and reflect: “Perhaps there is something I see in the other person that I think I don’t deserve, when I really do.”
Whether it’s more patience, more self-care, more physical attention, more relaxation, or more connection, notice that the very thing you criticize may be the very thing you need.
(Image by Rodolfo Clix)
CDs to soothe the soul
My Relaxation Reverie CD collection offers meditation, guided-imagery and relaxation audio. My new website, Cozy Children, is the place for children's audio stories.
Here are three audio samples:
Fall Reverie
Magic Forest
Toy Store