Today, the traditional destructive way of repressing vital emotions continues to be concealed by those old numbing tricks of popping a pill, having a drink, going on the Internet to find some pornography. Staying late at work, having an affair. Sooner or later the pill or a drink or the drugs or the Internet will only fill so much of a temporary void until another drink or hit is needed ... and … [Read more...]
Archives for January 2009
‘Shame rage’ and the Death of Love
One of the more defining dynamics that can cause the Death of Love is what's called the shame-rage cycle. One partner shames the other by way of critical, abusive remarks and the other responds with defensive rage in an attempt to protect herself or himself from verbal or emotional assault. Once this point-counterpoint cycle begins, one or both partners are likely to resort to some kind of … [Read more...]
Abuse: It’s not normal, it’s wacky
Do you think you have been abused in your life? No? Well, read on. Most of us have developed a high tolerance for what I call wacky abuse. We're becoming accustomed these days to using the word "abuse," although for many it is still an uncomfortable term. Many of us believe abuse is a normal part of child rearing. In fact, let's consider that term, child rearing. Some parents view their … [Read more...]